That's it. The time has come, to battle the enemy. To shake of my fear, flip through my "heroics for dummies" and get down to the business of kicking my nicotine addiction right back to the BIG TOBACCO CO. in the USA.
It has only been a few hours since my last 3 cigarettes (last night, at approximately 20.30 I finally gave into the physical craving) and I'm unsure whether I will make it through this day.
The cravings are severe - in fact, I did not expect this. I expected something bad, and I thought I was prepared. But I wasn't.
The fact that I began smoking about 10 to 20 cigarettes each day, since about the age of 16, means that my brain depends on nictotine to a very large degree.
As I sit here, I can barely type. The withdrawel is severe.
But what really motivates me, is not the fact that I know nicotine addiction can be beat and overcome, but the fact that my addiction is part of the big business plan of big tobacco companies. In fact, that pisses me off to the core!
I've realised that they go to extreme lengths to ensure that I'm a "return" customer. They pump cigarettes full of chemicals, which are, in my mind, far worse for my health than my addiction to nicotine, although the nicotine addiction is what makes me such a good, reliable, stupid customer.
This morning, fighting cravings every step of the way, I remembered a day a few years ago, when I was sixteen. SIXTEEN. A child. A young adult. Open to evil manipulation.
I'd seen a programme on television, about the dangers of smoking. The programme showed cancer victims and all the other sick stuff resulting from smoking mass-produced cigarettes. But the thing that stuck in my mind, and which scared me, was the reporter saying that it had been proven that the earlier someone begins to smoke, the bigger the chances of cancer were.
SO, at sixteen, I tried for the first time, to kick the habit. And I failed. Three days later I failed. The memory makes me sad and angry at the same time. What chance did I really have to kick the habit, without really knowing the power it had. I could not prepare myself.
Now I can. And I will beat the shit out of this addiction. Screw the big, fat Americans and British with their big, fat tobacco bank accounts.
(Due to withdrawel, this post might seem a bit disorientated and wired.)
It has only been a few hours since my last 3 cigarettes (last night, at approximately 20.30 I finally gave into the physical craving) and I'm unsure whether I will make it through this day.
The cravings are severe - in fact, I did not expect this. I expected something bad, and I thought I was prepared. But I wasn't.
The fact that I began smoking about 10 to 20 cigarettes each day, since about the age of 16, means that my brain depends on nictotine to a very large degree.
As I sit here, I can barely type. The withdrawel is severe.
But what really motivates me, is not the fact that I know nicotine addiction can be beat and overcome, but the fact that my addiction is part of the big business plan of big tobacco companies. In fact, that pisses me off to the core!
I've realised that they go to extreme lengths to ensure that I'm a "return" customer. They pump cigarettes full of chemicals, which are, in my mind, far worse for my health than my addiction to nicotine, although the nicotine addiction is what makes me such a good, reliable, stupid customer.
This morning, fighting cravings every step of the way, I remembered a day a few years ago, when I was sixteen. SIXTEEN. A child. A young adult. Open to evil manipulation.
I'd seen a programme on television, about the dangers of smoking. The programme showed cancer victims and all the other sick stuff resulting from smoking mass-produced cigarettes. But the thing that stuck in my mind, and which scared me, was the reporter saying that it had been proven that the earlier someone begins to smoke, the bigger the chances of cancer were.
SO, at sixteen, I tried for the first time, to kick the habit. And I failed. Three days later I failed. The memory makes me sad and angry at the same time. What chance did I really have to kick the habit, without really knowing the power it had. I could not prepare myself.
Now I can. And I will beat the shit out of this addiction. Screw the big, fat Americans and British with their big, fat tobacco bank accounts.
(Due to withdrawel, this post might seem a bit disorientated and wired.)
3 comments:
and then..?
Volker, du sollst Jana sagen von the benefits, better kissing, more money, more shoes and handbags!!Rudolph
Fok dude, du wirst pullen left right and centre and not to mention the money you will save on teeth whitening one day.
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